PAINFUL MEM'RIES
Review of Christmas Memories (Target Version)
Released on 10/30/01
"Mem'ries may be beautiful and yet
What's to painful to remember
We simply choose to forget"
(from The Way We Were)
It was very difficult reviewing this new recording. Every time I listened to it, my heart chose to forget. For one, this new Streisand recording did not do anything to put me in the Christmas spirit. On the contrary, it depressed me and put me to sleep (in that order). In addition to being the second-most dreary Christmas recording I've ever heard (the first is Linda Ronstadt's), there are several general problems with Christmas Memories:
1- The Voice. Barbra seems to have accepted that she can't sing certain notes anymore. The shrill, squeaky, thin high notes are for the most part gone this time (thank goodness). However, her voice, in general, continues its decline. Not only are the high notes missing, but the vibrato sounds shaky in many spots (some times it sounds like a gurgle, a gargle or both). What bothered me the most of the packaging (even more than the tacky cover with the poorly computer-generated Barbra ornament), was Jay Landers' remark, "Today ... she's singing with even greater richness, clarity and golden tone than ever before". This is simply a lie. Her work of the 60's and 70's is her best, by far. Today she is hampered by age and years of inadequate vocal practice.
2- Poor Choice of Songs. Her ability to pick songs, or lack thereof, is just as bad as it's been throughout the last decade (and getting worse). They are hundreds of great Christmas songs that Barbra has not sung; however, only 2 such songs were chosen (I'll be Home for Christmas and What Are You Doing New Year's Eve). Of the remaining songs, only two are known to be good (though not Christmas related): Schubert's Ave Maria and One God. The other 8 songs are either new, relatively unknown, reworded for Christmas, or not really Christmas songs. As evident in the song by song commentary which follows, many of these songs are too dreary to work in a Christmas setting.
3- Sincerity. Finally, what is a (not-so) Nice Jewish Girl like Barbra doing singing Christmas songs? There was a time she refused to sing "dependent-victim" songs because she couldn't "feel" them. And how can she feel Christmas songs or songs like Ave Maria which are not Jewish? Her recent songs reflect her, except for these "Christmas" songs which don't fit the picture. It really seems quite hypocritical. (Discuss amongst yourselves.)
I'll be Home for Christmas (IBHFC)
This is one of the most famous and beautiful Christmas songs ever written. Singer after singer have performed it, always with good results. Until now. Babs, who loves to borrow material, always makes it a point to change something (a lyric, an instrument, adding a lost intro, etc.) so that she can proclaim herself the "great innovator". For this song, she decided to give it a jazzy feel, pretty much the same thing she did with Some Enchanted Evening years ago. (Actually, David Foster and Johnny Mandel were the two who created the Some Enchanted Evening "concept" for Barbra. Though Barbra is credited with co-producing IBHFC, she does give David a special thanks for his work on this song.)
Anyhow, this "concept" didn't work then and it doesn't work now. IBHFC is supposed to be a sad, nostalgic song which conveys the tragic longing for wanting to be home with family. After all, it was written during World War II. When the song first starts, it seems to be somewhere close to recreating this mood, but then at the 2 minute mark, the "concept" kicks in, destroying the mood and any sense this song once had. Ironically, Barbra was always known for being able to add strong emotions to music (sadness, tragedy and loss were easy for her to do). Here she is dead as a doornail, lost in a jazzy concept that works better in third-rate cabaret.
If you want to see how this song was supposed to sound, please check out the late Karen Carpenters' version on the Carpenters' Christmas Portrait.
A Christmas Love Song
Speaking of Johnny Mandel... He is credited with co-writing this song with Marilyn and Alan Bergmans (aka, the Bergmans). I guess it is in the spirit of Christmas to be charitable and help those in need. So here we have one of Barbra's two acts of charity on this recording. By recording a Bergman song, she enables them to get royalties so they shouldn't starve. Consistent with the most recent Bergman songs (all of which appear on Streisand products), this one is really not worth writing about. As for Barbra, she does squeak a few times (on the high notes).
What Are You Doing New Year's Eve
As with IBHFC, I was really looking forward to this song, another seasonal gem. The great thing about a lot of Christmas gems is that the songs are so good that all the singer has to do is stick to the notes. Thank goodness, Barbra pretty much does so this time and survives. The beauty of the song is very much intact in her subdued performance. However, for those who prefer a flawless rendition, please note that the late Karen Carpenter recorded this song on the Carpenters' Old Fashioned Christmas album.
I Remember
Why is everything with Streisand a "memory" (or rather, a "mem'ry"). Isn't there something else she can sing about? This Stephen Sondheim song was not even a Christmas song, until Barbra asked him to tie it in for Christmas. Not one of Sondheim's best works (it was written in the early part of his career), it is not one of Babs' most "mem'rable" performances either.
Snowbound
I grew up in San Juan, Puerto Rico, where there's never snow. So, I don't equate snow with Christmas and honestly don't understand how this dull attempt at a love song belongs on a Christmas "album" (Hey! I still call it that, too! I guess Babs and I do have one thing in common.)
It Must Have Been the Mistletoe
A lot of fans have proclaimed this the best track of the album. As much as I believe Barbra needs to do upbeat songs, I'm not all that thrilled with this particular attempt. She seems to be having some trouble with her phrasing in the runs and really doesn't do anything to add to the song's interesting melody. However, as dreary as the rest of the album is, I can understand why fans would be ecstatic with this one. Thank you, Barbra.
Christmas Lullaby
How do I HATE Ann Hampton Calloway? Let me count the ways. Barbra, on the other hand, loves this woman. I will never understand it. The only thing Ann did of any significance was the theme of the TV show The Nanny. Now that required talent. This plain, simple NOTHING of a song does not.
Christmas Mem'ries
It's Barbra's second act of Charity on this album. Yup! it's the Bergmans again. You can smell the skank a mile away. Every other song they write has the word "memories" in it (frequently spelled "mem'ries", by the way) and the same patterns repeated from other older songs. For example,
"singing carols
stringing popcorn
making footprints
in the snow
"mem'ries
Christmas mem'ries
they're the sweetest ones
I know"
Does it remind you of:
"mornings
evenings
days that hurried past
dreams that should have lasted
Laughter
long songs
footsteps that I hear
make me thing your near me
(from Places that belong to you, by Marilyn and Alan Bergman)
Even the foot theme repeats itself. I've said it before and I'll say it again, the Bergmans are going through a writer's block phase that started decades ago and looks like it's never going to end.
Grown-Up Christmas List
David Foster, one of the most successful producers of our time, both co-wrote and produced this song. However, his recent work for Streisand just doesn't seem to be as good as his other work. Has Foster lost his touch? I don't think so. Foster has just produced another masterpiece: God Bless America, performed by Streisand's nemesis Celine Dion. So if the problem isn't Foster, then who could it be? For one, Foster's arrangement calls for some dramatic and somewhat acrobatic vocalizing which Streisand just can't do anymore. However, that doesn't stop her from trying. The near-tragic result is full of very strained and sometimes squeaky vocal sounds.
Schubert's Ave Maria
Why do non-classical singers insist on singing this? In Streisand's case, perhaps it was the success she had singing Gounod's Ave Maria 35 years ago. In a time where people believed pop singers could not sing classical music, Barbra wowed the world with a powerful, inimitable rendition of Gounod's breathtaking melody. But, that was 35 years ago, when Streisand still had her contralto-like range and opera-like vibrato. Today, without these, Barbra is at a loss trying to sing Schubert's Ave Maria, which is considered by some to be a more difficult song than Gounod's. Unable to sing the song as it was composed, Barbra tries to compensate by adding herself in harmony. It just doesn't work that way. Two weak voices (in this case the same voice harmonizing with itself) and a loud choir don't add up to a missing soprano.
If you really want to know how this song goes, please check out Lesley Garret's A Soprano Inspired CD. If you must listen to a pop singer's rendition, check out Celine Dion's These are Special Times CD or Linda Eder's Christmas Stays the Same CD.
Closer
Where does she finds songs like this? It seems the drearier they are the more she likes them. This particular tune, tailored for her at her request, is not a good follow up to Schubert's Ave Maria, one of the most famous and recognized melodies of all time. Closer is as forgettable and ephemeral as Ave Maria is memorable and eternal. Barbra's performance really doesn't help either. This song is about closeness to a lost loved one, but with her heartless rendition, you would never guess. My Heart Will Go On it isn't.
One God
I first heard this song years ago on a Johnny Mathis compilation. It's a wonderful song and a beautiful thought, although it is clear to me that Jehovah, Allah, Vishnu, Buddha, etc., are NOT the same. Nonetheless, I loved the song and yearned for another singer to give it a chance (I don't care for Johnny Mathis). Even in her state of serious vocal decline, Streisand manages to give a performance (the one solid performance on this album) that puts Mathis to shame. However, for the first time in her career, Barbra finally gets drowned out by the orchestra and choir. 35 years ago, the arranger of The Lord's Prayer decided the finale would feature the orchestra, choir and Barbra at full throttle. Of course, Barbra soared above the whole thing. Not this time. On the last note of One God, which tries to end in the same way as The Lord's Prayer, she just disappears in a midst of overzealous and out-of-control strings, horns and voices. Come to think of it, this would be the perfect end for her singing career—drowned in a huge big mess.
BONUS SONG: God Bless America
BTW, the word bonus was chosen by Target. I would hardly argue that this was a bonus. Recorded live in 1992, this version is probably Barbra's best attempt at this song. However, it is really not that good. Actually, it's quite bad. God Bless America is not an easy song to sing and Barbra had trouble giving it the feel it needed. Her version sounds doubly worse given the song was just recorded by Celine Dion in collaboration with David Foster. Celine's version, first featured live in the Tribute to Heroes, is brilliantly and refreshingly arranged. Of course, at the heart of Foster's new production is Dion's heartfelt and powerful vocal, which was the highlight of the Tribute. I'm sorry, but Streisand simply cannot compete with Dion. The good news is that Dion's version is now available on Sony's God Bless America CD which is for the benefit of the Twin Towers Fund. Barbra's version, however, appears to be for the benefit of Target and of herself.
|
The Irreverent Guide to Barbra Streisand wishes to thank the following sources of inspiration for this web page...
On second thought, maybe not.
Please note that this site is neither maintained nor supported by Barbra Streisand or her management. Furthermore, The Irreverent Guide to Barbra Streisand is not an official or unofficial newsletter or publication related
to or endorsed by Barbra Streisand, Barbra Joan Streisand, Barbara Streisand, Babs or her fan clubs.
Original content and design © 2001, 2003. The Irreverent Guide to Barbra Streisand is for entertainment value only; no financial
gain or profit is sought nor has been obtained through this web site. What's more, the site is not intended
to reflect the political and/or personal views of the author nor web hosting provider. It's for fun, ok?